Returning champion Joe Sinclitico joins us this week to discuss current events, both geopolitical and celebrity, plus The Housemaid. Will he come up with a pithy name for Mein Kampf 3? Tune in!

But first, we invite three enormous dumbasses to discuss the world’s HOTTEST new war with Iran. Incidentally, it’s the same three dumbasses on the rest of the show, too. While it’s too early to determine who will take over in Iran, Reza Pahlavi appears to be in the driver’s seat, abandoning his cushy life in the DC burbs to potentially return to the country that deposed his dad almost half a century ago. Let’s see how this plays out.

Meanwhile, Pete Buttigieg is back and he’s trying on a new persona like he’s in a glow-up montage. Personally, I think “guy who is insanely horny for military vehicles” looks a bit strange on him, probably because he’s an autumn. USED TO HAVE HIGH HIGH HOPES FOR A LIVIN NOW IM JACKIN OFF WHEN THE MISSILES START KILLIN. Oh wait this bit was about Pete Hegseth, not Buttigieg, but I don’t feel like writing another joke.

At long last, Shia LaBeouf’s reign of terror in the city of New Orleans is over. He sits down with Andrew Callaghan to talk about his hatred of Mike Piazza, and kissing Jesus. We simply must shut the Disney Channel down before it ruins all of our favorite child stars.

Finally, we all watched Housemaid, starring Sydney Sweeney and Amanda Seyfried. It’s a schlocky thriller about a young woman (Sweeney) who goes to live as a maid with a seemingly perfect family, but below the surface, things may be exactly as weird as you’d expect for people with this much money. Spare a moment for poor Sydney, an excellent actress who would likely be taken more seriously if not for her notoriously well-endowed chest. Anyway, we gave it three awoogas and a homina homina.